Thursday, May 19, 2011

Soft Focus on the Future

"One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want
is that we never direct our focus;
we never concentrate our power.
Most people dabble their way through life,
never deciding to master anything in particular."
-Tony Robbins

Today had the potential to be a very stressful day: Map test, debut of school play, play practice after school, and Tae Kwon Do belt test. All of this on not enough sleep because last night, after my son did his homework, we played Battleship and then danced to some old disco music, 'cuz that's what I like to do. In my defense, he was pretty tightly wound due to a lot of activities culminating this week, so we had some energy to work out. He didn't get to bed until about 10 p.m. and I know that was way too late, but we were having a great time together. However, waking up tired this morning, the day could have easily gone south.

It didn't; turned out to be a great day for him. The map test went well, the play was great, practice went smoothly and he decided to finish his homework while waiting during practice, then off to the belt test which he was extremely excited for. Nervous, no - excited, absolutely!

Tae Kwon Do is something he's been wanting to do for quite a while. Tonight was his second test and, for the second time, he got the blue star for highest score for his belt level (more sewing for mom), and he was recognized as the best tester, receiving the highest score out of the whole class.

Now, this is where you might think I'm going to brag about his skills and ability and how he just nailed the test, and I'd love to, but that is not the part that impressed me most. You might even think I would be impressed by the way he walked through this day it with confidence, serenity and absolute joy. Yes, I was, but that wasn't the best part either.

What impressed me most, is the way he responded when he received his star, recognition, and new belt. Even though I knew he was absolutely thrilled and excited, he didn't bust out a big grin or wiggle at all. He just smiled ever so slightly and humbly, and his eyes held a soft, yet strong and steady gaze. It was the look of someone who knows they worked their butt off for something important to them, and it paid off. It was the look of pride in self coupled with tremendous humility in the moment.

Right then I saw a glimpse into the future; the man he will become. I had to catch my breath. Yes, there will be rough times; he's had a few this year. There will be challenges to meet, compromises to make, personalities to negotiate, and obstacles to overcome, but he's learning how. He knows what he wants and that he must work hard for it. Tonight he saw how that kind of work pays off - not for anyone else, but for himself.

Many times I look at my son, see a very wise old soul, and wonder how I got so lucky. I'm not sure who's teaching who, because when I truly listen to what he has to say, it's so much better than anything I could come up with. Yes, the kid takes my breath away at least once every day, but today he filled me with such awe that I'm still breathless.

As I put this sweet child to bed, I will bow to him in love and respect and kiss the living daylights out of him. Then, I will bow to the universe for this most precious gift, and most grateful.


Jan said...

Oh my goodness, Tammy. Your post is beautiful and beautifully written. You are a writer...even late at night. You must be very proud of your son.

Tell him that a few of your friends are proud of him, too.

BIKE LADY said...

Only a mom can appreciate these subtle things so well--and then write about them. Nice job, mom!